Note from Stacey

I got an e-mail from a young climber friend traveling in South America. On her trip she has been ill several times, and wrote to me her thoughts about mortality. It was a surprising letter coming from someone so young. Looking back, I know I never thought about these things until I was diagnosed with a terminal disease at age 35. As a lung transplant patient, I am part of a community that lives with the stress of getting sick very easily, rejection, and death within a handful of years. I have recently heard that one woman who had her transplant two years ago is now back on oxygen, experiencing rejection, and waiting for a second transplant! At the support group meeting yesterday, a man who had a transplant at Stanford just died only three months out. So this letter about mortality set me thinking again. As the support flows in for the climb-a-thon this Sunday, I feel privileged to have the respect and love of the community. It really makes life fun and meaningful. I want to show my appreciation with my thoughts, which I put in words to my traveling friend. Here is an excerpt from my letter: When I got ill with LAM, I tried to figure out what the grand plan was…why was I chosen to have this disease, go through a transplant, and face death early? It turns out that I have been able to draw the local climbing community’s attention to compassion for the sick, to look for courage not only on the rocks but also in fighting the fear of death. When I was waiting for a transplant, months away from possible death, I spent a lot of time trying to develop inner peace. It the larger scheme of things, all beings live and die. It has been like that for millions of years. Achieving peace would mean that no matter what happened, my spirit would be okay. Reading about Taoism helped me. In Taoism, the only truth is that everything changes. Isn’t that true. Facing mortality is also a great way to realize what is worth living for…and valuing the quality time we have with friends and family while we are on Earth. Love can pull us out of the depths of depression, and it can be what makes life worth living. I have experienced this first-hand in the last couple years. Some of my most special moments of my life were when I was lying in a hospital bed, visiting with my mom, my family, or friends. I am so grateful to those who showed they cared. Thanks for reminding me to think deeply. -Stacey, from Belmont